More Barney's Great Adventure (battybarney2014's version)
More Barney's Great Adventure is a 2004 film based on the children's television series Barney & Friends. The film was written by Cheryl Ammeter directed by Dwin Towell, produced by HiT Entertainment and Good Egg Productions, and released by PolyGram Filmed Entertainment on September 6, 2004 in the United States and Canada at the height of Barney's popularity. Plot On a road trip to their Jackson Grandparents' farm, Kids are content playing with a stuffed Barney doll, while Nick believes Barney's "kids stuff." At the farm house, Nick takes Barney from the girls and hides him in the shower, where he comes to life. Barney tries to convince Nick that it was his imagination that made him real, but fails to do so. Instead he points out that real dinosaurs don't laugh or talk or laugh- there aren't any real dinosaurs anymore! Nick plays a trick for Barney to disappear, because he doesn't believe in him. For revenge, Barney reappears because he believes in Nick. Wishing to do something no one's done before, an egg shoots down from the sky into the barn. The next day, Barney, Stacy and Laura went to have fun on the farm and Nick steps in cow poop all over his new shoes. They find the egg in the barn and the first ring lit up. While going to ask David and Laura's grandparents about the egg, Barney heard Baby Fig and went up to check on him. Nick finds Barney in the baby's room and they take the egg to Mrs. Goldfinch, the local bird lady. They learn it's a dream maker and they have to return the egg before all four of its colored rings light up, Purple, Green, Yellow and Red. Nick loses the egg by knocking it out a passage way and it lands on a bird seed truck. The chase is on! From a parade with a marching band and a visit to Chez Snobbe, a fancy restaurant, to a circus, the kids and Barney are on a persuit for the egg. When a juggler sends it flying, the kids lose all hope of finding it, but Barney tells them to not give up. After learning it ended up on a balloon, the group imagines (with the help of the audience) flying on an airplane made out of a log. Barney's friend, the Collector, has the egg as a ballast (to keep the balloon steady), but after some convincing, he drops it and Abby catches it just in time. Back on the farm, the egg hatches in the barn, revealing a koala-like creature, named Twinken. He shows David's dream (to be a jockey and win a baseball game) to everyone. Nick apologizes to Barney for being mean to him and admits he thinks he's cool. Barney accepts his apology and tells Nick he thinks he's cool too and the two share a hug. Twinken then shows Barney's dream : "a special places, a special place and sharing the movie with it the tiny help to loves," which leads Barney and the rest of the cast to sing "I Love You." Baby Bop gets sleepy, which prompts BJ to decide that they're ready to go home. The film ends with Barney turning back into a doll with Twinken sitting right next to him, as the two of them wink. Cast *Barney (Voice: Dean Wendt, Costume: Carey Stinson) *Baby Bop (Voice: Julie Johnson, Costume: Jeff Ayers) *BJ (Voice: Patty Wirtz, Costume: Kyle Nelson) *Stacy (Alyssa Franks) *Pop-Pop (Jim Ponds) *Mee-Ma (Cathy Msingi Jones) *Laura (Julia Nicholson) *Anna (Carlyn Hinojosa) *Nick (Grayson Lee Vanover) *Miguel (Riley Morrison) *Rachel (Hunter Pecunia) *Jackson (Daven Wilson) *David (Emilio Mazur) *Kami (Makayla Crawford) *Whitney (Kayla S. Levels) *Perry (Sean Sandras) *Farmer Dooley (Dave Tanner) *Baby Fig (David Larouche / Edouard Larouche) *Stella the Storyteller (Phyllis Cicero) *Mr. Boyd (Robert Sweatman) *Twinken (Voice: James LeBrecht) *Mr. Millet (Rock Jutras) *Dad (Lee Burns) *Mom (Dale Evans) *The Collector (Steffen Foster) *The Juggler (Michael Davis) *Zelda the Zookeeper (Nancy Drotning *Stanley Stillz (David Lebel) *Policeman (John Dunn-Hill) *Officer Thompson (Noreen Davis) *Parade Stilt Walkers (Andre St-Jean & Paul Vachon) *Sousaphone Player (Barry Taras) *Woman with Hat (Sheena Larkin) *The Waiter (Matt Holland) *Maitre D' (Alain Gendreau) *Waiters (Martin Boisvert, Alain Gaithier, Danielle Lecourtois, Jaques Moisan, and Kathleen Renaud) *Chez Snobbe Delivery Man (Normand Carriere) *Monkeys/Teddy Bears/Circus Clowns (Jean Filion & Francoise Herbert) *Trapeze (Ruby Rowat) *Acrobatic Biycle (Luc Tremblay) *Chineese Pole (Mathieu Roy) *Contertionist (Jinny Jacinto) *Trampolinist/Teeter Board Pusher (Dave Level) *Teeter Board Flyer (Alain Gauthier) *Maurice the Magician (Alberto Ramirez, Jr) *The Queen of Hearts (Carol Farabee) *Mother Goose (Barbara Lowin) *Monty the Mountie (Gaitley Mathews) *Paloma (Irene Cortez) *Pop Wheely (Grant James) *Teeter Board Pusher (Andre St-Jean) *The Winkster (David Voss / Ashley Wood) *Teeter Board Spotter (Roch Jutras) *Female Wire Walker (Molly Saudek) *Marching Band Musicians Songs #Barney - The Song (sung by Sandy Duncan) #Imagine #Let Me Call You Sweetheart #It's Twinkle Time #Down on Grandpa's Farm #John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt #Who's Inside It? #If All the Raindrops #We're Gonna Find a Way #I Love You (Extended Version) Credits #You Can Do Anything #Rainbows Follow the Rain #Barney - The Song (reprise) Sequel A sequel titled, Barney's Great Adventure: The Nightmares Before Christmas was released on September 17, 2013. Production Word of a Barney film first arose in August 29, 1988 when Debbie Ries, sales director for the Lyons Group said plans for a movie was in the works. In 1991, it was later announced by creator Sheryl Leach at the The National Press Club in Washington, D.C. that a movie was coming. Later in 1993, a Barney Magazine states that Barney would star in his first ever film entitled Barney: The Movie. It would originally be distributed worldwide by Geffen Pictures through Warner Bros and produced by Karen Barnes. According to Halim Jabbour, it had a release date for August 3, 1994. Lyons had disagreements over marketing, leading the latter to bring the film (with help from now former producer Geffen) to Polygram. On February 1996, Barney himself announced his film at a news conference at the Beverly Hills Hotel. Later in August 2001, teaser trailers for the film More Barney's Great Adventure: The Movie arose on VHS cassettes with some Barney Home Videos. To Sheryl Leach, it was a joy of filming as she stated "It was a joy to do the film because it took me back to the early days in Barney's development. Just like the beginning days of Barney, this movie takes him to places children have never experienced with him before. The film was a great opportunity to open new story lines and environments so that children can travel to new places with their friend, Barney," Leach says. "The film goes to some incredible places that we hope will appeal not only to children but to adults as well." Leach adds that the film allowed them to "take the familiar Barney and put him outdoors and in other very different settings from his traditional environments." The film was shot on locations outside Montreal, Canada, including the renowned Ste. AnnedeBellevue's Morgan Arboretum, a popular wildlife sanctuary. The veteran film crew was initially a bit skeptical of the large purple star. Music and Soundtrack Main Article: More Barney's Great Adventure: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack. The soundtrack from More Barney's Great Adventure: The Movie includes a star-studded cast. The film features an original title song by Tony Award-winning Broadway composer Jerry Herman (Hello Dolly!, Mame) and performed by Bernadette Peters. Peabo Bryson, Sheena Easton, Jeffrey Osborne, Valerie Carter, Linda Ronstadt, Roberta Flack, George Hearn, Jennifer Rush, Take 6, Johnny Van Zant, Jennifer Warnes and the young Latina sensation, Gina, also perform numbers. Main Article: More Barney's Great Adventure Sing and Dance More Barney's Great Adventure Sing Along''' is an audio cassette.It was the second entry in the Barney's Sing Along series of cassettes. It was released on September 28, 2004. It's an album to the movie, "More Barney's Great Adventure", Release Critical Reception The film received overwhelmingly negative reviews from film critics. On Rotten Tomatoes, the film currently has a "Rotten" score of 26%, based on 23 reviews with only 6 fresh reviews, and a rating of a 4.2 out of 10. It was nominated for two awards at the 19th Golden Raspberry Awards: '''"Worst New Star" (Barney) and "Worst Original Song" '''(Barney - The Song) , but lost to An Alan Smithee Film: Burn Hollywood Burn though the former award was tied with Ringmaster. Box office In its limited release weekend, the film grossed $6,306,865 and ranked #11. A week later, in wide release, it grossed $1,382,373 and ranked #17. By the end of its run, the film grossed $16,320,938 in the domestic box office, almost returning its $17 million budget. Home Media It was released on VHS and DVD on May 12, 2005 Trivia *In honor of the film, a television special titled More Barney's First Adventures was aired February 2006 on PBS Kids. It was soon released as a bonus feature on the DVD to More Barney's Great Adventure. *The film's premiere was held at Rosemont Theatre, the same stage where Barney preformed 16 sold-out concerts seventh years before. *This is the first time that "I Love You" was sung for three verses (The 1st and last verses are the same). *"If You're Happy and You Know It" is much more grander and longer on the soundtrack than in the movie. *Baby Bop and BJ have very minor roles in the film (almost like cameo appearances). *The only way to get the original theatrical print on video is on the laser disc version. *Although the Caption Center WGBH Educational Foundation mostly captioned all Barney installments since 1991, this film is one exception, as it is closed-captioned by the National Captioning Institute. *Three of the movie's TV spots sample the song, Born to Be Wild by Steppenwolf. However, the song never appeared in the movie itself. *Production for this video flim movie took place in September 15, 2003-May 14, 2004. *The VHS releases have trailers for the film video aired on PBS in 2006, being the eight Barney Home Videos to be televised. * Rachel wears the same clothes and hairstyle in "Look What I Can Do!". * Kami wears the same clothes and hairstyle in "Look What I Can Do!". * Whitney wears the same clothes and hairstyle in "Barney's Best Manners: You Invitation to Fun!". * Nick wears the same clothes from Season 9 episodes. And short hair. * Jackson wears the same clothes from Season 9 episodes. And short hair. * David wears the same clothes from Season 9 episodes. And short hair. * Stacy wears the same clothes and head-banded hairstyle from Season 9 episodes. * Miguel wears the same clothes from Season 9 episodes. And short hair. * Laura wears the same clothes and hairstyle in My Friends, The Doctor and the Dentist. * Anna wears the same clothes and hairstyle in Making a Move!. * The Barney costume from "Look What I Can Do!" is used. *Based on the film, two books were released. One titled More Barney's Great Adventure and Barney's Great Adventure: More Chase is Back!. Also based on the film was a board game released titled More Barney's Great Adventure - The Movie - Follow More Game, More Fun!. *To promote the film, Barney, BJ and Baby Bop performed "Imagine" on November 2005 in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Script Changes *Originally the egg was going to hatch a giant bird, who misses its mother. *Baby Bop and BJ were expected to make a lot more screen time, appearing in the farmhouse attic, but those scenes were soon scraped, as Gomer claimed the scenes to be "unaffordable." *Miss Goldfinch was originally planned to be a comedic character, as apposed to the more subdued character of the final film. *The circus scenes and the "Collector" character were not in the original drafts. In addition, rather than using a log, Barney and friends would have built a plane out of cardboard boxes Quotes (English version) Quote 1 (English version) *(As the Walt Disney Pictures logo fades off the screen, the chorus is heard in the background mixes with the bells of Notre Dame ringing. A long zoom in through the city until we reach Clopin singing to a group of children watching his puppet show) *Clopin: Morning in Paris, the city awakens to the bells of Notre Dame. The fisherman fishes, the bakerman bakes to the bells of Notre Dame. To the big bells as loud as the thunder to the little bells soft as a psalm. And some say the soul of the city's the toll of the bells. The bells of Notre Dame! (spoken) Listen, they're beautiful, no? So many colors of sounds, so many changing moods. Because, you know, they don't ring all by themselves. *Puppet: They don't?! *Clopin: No, silly boy. Up there, high, high in the dark bell tower, lives the mysterious bell ringer. Who is this creature? *Puppet: Who? *Clopin: What is he? *Puppet: What? *Clopin: How did he come to be here? *Puppet: How? *Clopin: Hush! *Puppet: Ohh... *Clopin: And Clopin will warn you. It is a tale, a tale of a man and a monster! *(A wipe to a dark night. A band of gypsies are silently proceeding down the Seine, hoping to avoid detection. A baby in the woman's arms begins to cry) *Clopin: Dark was the night if our tale was begun on the docks near Notre Dame. *Quasimodo's Father: Shut it up, will you? *Jacques: We'll be spotted! *Quasimodo's Mother: Hush, little one! *Clopin: Four frightened gypsies slid silently under the docks near Notre Dame. *Boatman: Four guilders for safe passage into Paris. *Clopin: But a trap had been laid for the gypsies as they gazed up in fear and alarm. At a figure whose clutches were iron as much as the bells. *Quasimodo's Father: Judge Claude Frollo! *Clopin: The bells of Notre Dame. Judge Claude Frollo longed to purge the world of vice and sin. And he saw corruption everywhere, except within. *Frollo: Bring these gypsy vermin to the Palace of Justice. *Guard: (To mother) You there! Whatcha hiding from? *Frollo: Stolen goods, no doubt. Take them from her. *Clopin: Se fue! *(As Quasimodo's mother tries to escape with her baby, Judge Frollo gives chase on horseback. She reaches the doors of Notre Dame and pounds on them) *Quasimodo's Mother: Sanctuary! Please give us sanctuary! *(Frollo eventually catches up to her on the steps of the cathedral. He tears the yet-covered bundle from her arms and kicks her, sending her smashing to the cement steps, where she is knocked unconscious. The baby begins to cry) *Frollo: A baby? *(Frollo uncovers the baby's head, seeing the deformed infant) *Frollo: A monster! *(He looks around, searching for a road to expose the creature. He sees a well and rides over to it. He is about to drop the baby down the well as a voice shouts out) *Archdeacon: Stop! *Clopin: Cried the archdeacon. *Frollo: This is an unholy demon. I'm sending it back to hell, where that belongs! *Archdeacon: See there the innocent blood you have spilled on the steps of Notre Dame. *Frollo: I am guiltless----se fue, I pursued. *Archdeacon: Now you would add this child's blood to your guilt on the steps of Notre Dame. *Clopin: My conscience is clear! *Archdeacon: You can lie to yourself and your minions. You can claim that you haven't a qualm. But you never can run from, now look what you've done from the eyes. The very eyes of Notre Dame! *Clopin: And for one time in his life or power and control, Frollo felt a twinge of fear for his immortal soul. *Frollo: What must I do? *Archdeacon: Care for the child, and raise it as your own. *Frollo: What? I'm to be saddled with this misshapen-- *(He pauses as a thought creeps across his face) *Frollo: Very well. Let him live with you, in your church. *Archdeacon: Live here? Where? *Frollo: Anywhere. (sings) Just where he's kept locked away where no one else can see. (spoken) The bell tower, perhaps. And who knows---our Lord works in mysterious fashions. (singing) Even this foul creature may yet prove one day to be of use to me. *Clopin: And Frollo gave the child a cruel name. A name that means half-formed......Quasimodo! Now here is a riddle to guess if you can, sing the bells of Notre Dame. Who is the monster and who is the man? Sing the bells, bells, bells, bells, bells, bells, bells, bells, bells of Notre Dame! *(We have wiped from watching Clopin's puppet show to the actual bells ringing in the tower, and the back of this mysterious Quasimodo ringing them. As we end on a beautiful shot of the bells ringing, and the word "Dame" is sung with the cymbal smash, the title "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" appears on screen) Quote 2 (English version) *(We fly down to an exterior with two gargoyles, one with a bird's nest in his mouth, on the balcony. As Quasimodo comes out, the bird awakens) *Quasimodo: Good morning! *(The bird squeaks its approval) *Quasimodo: Will today be the day? Are you ready to fly? *(The bird squeaks its disapproval) *Quasimodo: You sure? Good day to try. Why, if I picked a day to fly, oh, this would be it! The Festival of Fools! It will be fun----the jugglers and music and dancing......... *(The bird, who has been resting in Quasi's hand, has begun to flap its wings. Quasi slowly removes his hand until the bird is hovering in place. He chuckles and shows his hands to the bird, who eventually realizes that it's flying. It squeaks an approval, then a question, as a flock of birds fly by) *Quasimodo: Go ahead. Nobody wants to be cooped up here forever! *(The bird flies off to join the flock. As soon as it's gone, the two gargoyles Hugo, and later, Victor, come to life. Hugo spits out the nest) *Hugo: Oh, man! I thought he'd never leave! I'll be spitting feathers for a week! *Victor: Well, that's what you get for sleeping with your mouth open. *Hugo: (Sarcastic chuckle) Heh-heh-heh...go frighten a nun! Hey, Quasi! What's going on out there? A flight? A flogging? *Victor: A festival! *Hugo: You mean the Feast of Fools? *Quasimodo: Uh-huh! *Hugo: Alright, alright! Pour the wine and cut the cheese! *(Hugo makes farting noises in his armpit) *Victor: It is a treat to watch the colorful pageantry of the simple peasant-folk. *Hugo: Boy, nothing like balcony seats for watching the old F.O.F. *Quasimodo: (Dejected) Yes, watching. *(Quasi turns and leaves, obviously mournful) *Hugo: Oh look--a mime. *(Hugo hocks up a phlegm in his throat and is about to spot, as Victor covers his mouth. Hugo is forced to swallow his prize. They proceed inside to Quasimodo. A third gargoyle Laverne catches up to them) *Hugo: Hey, hey, hey, hey, what gives? *Victor: Aren't you going to watch the festival with us? *Hugo: I don't get it. *Victor: Perhaps he's sick! *Laverne: Impossible. If 20 years of listening to you two hasn't made him sick by now, nothing will. *Victor: But watching the Festival of Fools has always been the highlight of the year for Quasimodo. *Laverne: What good is watching the party if you never get to go hear it? (Birds have begun to roost on Laverne. She waves them away) Get away from me, go ahead, you bunch of buzzards! He's not made of stone, like us. *(Laverne goes to Quasi, who is at his table with a model of the city and small toys painted like townspeople) *Laverne: Quasi, what's wrong? You wanna warn old Laverne all about it? *Quasimodo: I...I just don't feel like watching the festival, that's all. *Laverne: Well, did you ever think about going there instead? *Quasimodo: Sure but, I'd never fit in out there. I'm not...normal. *Laverne: Oh, Quasi, Quasi, Quasi. (She pauses as the birds have returned to perch on her again) Do you mind? I would like to have a moment with the boy, if it's alright with you! *Hugo: (To Quasi) Hey, quit beating around the bell tower. Whatcha gotta do? Paint you a fresco? *Victor: As your friends and guardians, we insist you attend the festival. *Quasimodo: Me?! *(Enter Hugo, with a figurine of a Pope, from Quasi's tabletop scene) *Hugo: No, the Pope. Of course, you! *(Victor shoves the Pope figurine in Quasi's mouth) *Victor: It would be a veritable potpourri of educational experience. *(Hugo pulls the figurine out of Quasi's mouth) *Hugo: Wine, women and song! *Victor: You can learn to identify various regional cheeses! *Hugo: Bobbing for snails! *Victor: And the indigenous folk music. *Hugo: Play dunk the monk! *Laverne: Quasi, take it from an old spectator. Life's not a spectator sport. If watchin's all you're gonna do, then you're gonna watch your life go by without you. *Hugo: Yes, you're human, with the flesh and the hair and the navel lint. We're just part of the architecture, right, Victor? *Victor: Yet, if you chip us, will we not flake? And if you moisten us, do we not grow moist? *Laverne: Quasi, just grab a fresh tunic and a clean pair of hose and-- *Quasimodo: Thanks for the encouragement, but you're all forgetting one fact. *Gargoyles: What? *Quasimodo: My master, Frollo. *Everyone: (Dejectedly) Oh, yes, right. *Victor: Well, if he says you're forbidden from ever leaving the bell tower, does he mean "ever again?" *Quasimodo: Never ever! And he hates the Feast of Fools! He'd be furious if I asked to go. *Hugo: Who says you have to ask? *Quasimodo: Oh, dear. *Hugo: You sneak out... *Laverne: It's just one afternoon...... *Quasimodo: I couldn't--- *Hugo: And you sneak back in. *Laverne: He'll never know you were gone. *Quasimodo: I mean, if I got caught---- *Victor: Better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission. *Quasimodo: He might see me. *Hugo: You could wear a disguise. Just this once. What Frollo doesn't know can hurt you! *Victor: Ignorance is bliss. *Hugo: (aside) Look who's speaking.... *Laverne: Nobody wants to stay cooped up here forever. *(Quasi thinks for a moment, then a grin creeps across his face) *Quasimodo: You're right! I'll go! (The gargoyles cheer) I'll get cleaned up. (Another cheer) I'll stroll down these stairs. (Another cheer) I'll march through the doors and------ *(Quasi and the gargoyles have been advancing on the door leading downstairs. As Quasi nears it, Frollo appears in the doorway suddenly, cutting Quasi short and returning the gargoyles to stone) Quote 3 (English version) *Frollo: Good morning, Quasimodo. *Quasimodo: Ah, um, good...morning, master. *Frollo: Dear boy, whomever are you speaking to? *Quasimodo: My...friends. *Frollo: I see. (He taps Victor on the head) And what are your friends made of, Quasimodo? *Quasimodo: Stone. *Frollo: Can stone speak? *Quasimodo: No, it can't. *Frollo: That's right. You're a smart lad. Now...lunch. *(Upon hearing the word, Quasi goes off and retrieves a table setting; a silver chalice and plate for Frollo and a wooden cup and plate for himself) *Frollo: Shall we review your alphabet today? *Quasimodo: Yes, master. I would like that very much. *Frollo: Very well. A? *Quasimodo: Abomination. *Frollo: B? *Quasimodo: Blasphemy. *Frollo: C? *Quasimodo: C-c-c-contrition. *Frollo: D? *Quasimodo: Damnation. *Frollo: E? *Quasimodo: Eternal damnation! *Frollo: Good. F? *Quasimodo: Festival. *(Frollo spits out his drink at the incorrect reply) *Frollo: Excuse me? *Quasimodo: Forgiveness! *Frollo: You said...festival. *Quasimodo: No! *Frollo: You are thinking about going to the festival. *Quasimodo: It's just that...you go every year. *Frollo: I am a public official. I must go! But I don't enjoy a moment. Thieves and hustlers and the dregs of humankind, all mixed together in a shallow, drunken stupor. *Quasimodo: I didn't mean to upset you, master. *Frollo: Quasimodo, can't you understand? If your heartless mother abandoned you as a child, anyone else would have drowned you. And this is my thanks for taking you in and raising you as my son? *Quasimodo: I'm sorry, sir. Quote 4 (English version) *Frollo: Oh, my darling Quasimodo, you don't know what it's like out there. I do...I do... (sings) The world is cruel, the world is wicked. It's I alone whom you can trust in this entire city, I am your only friend. I who keep you, teach you, feed you, dress you. I who look upon you without fear. How can I protect you, boy? Unless you'll always stay in here, away in here? (Spoken) Remember what I taught you, Quasimodo. (back to song) You are deformed. *Quasimodo: I am deformed. *Frollo: And you are ugly. *Quasimodo: And I am ugly. *Frollo: And these are crimes for which the world shows little pity. You do not comprehend. *Quasimodo: You are my one defender. *Frollo: Out there, they'll revile you as a monster. *Quasimodo: I am a monster. *Frollo: Out there, they will hate with scorn and jeer. *Quasimodo: Only a monster. *Frollo: Why invite their calumny and consternation? Stay in there, be faithful to me. *Quasimodo: I'm faithful. *Frollo: Grateful to me. *Quasimodo: I'm grateful. *Frollo: Do as I say. Obey and stay in here. *Quasimodo: I'll stay in here. *(Frollo goes to leave) *Quasimodo: You are good to me, master. I'm sorry. *Frollo: You are forgiven. But, remember, Quasimodo; this is your sanctuary. *Quasimodo: My sanctuary. *(Exit Frollo) *Quasimodo: Safe behind these windows and these parapets of stone, gazing at the people down below me. All my life I watch them as I hide up here alone, hungry for the histories they show me. All my life I memorize their faces, knowing them as they will never know me. All my life I wonder how it feels to pass a day. Not above them....but part of them? And out there, living in the sun. Give me one day out there. All I ask is one, to hold forever. Out there, where they all live unaware. What I'd give...what I'd dare? Just to live one day out there! (Watch right here, after the cymbal smash, as the camera zooms past Quasi into a street scene) Out there among the millers, and the Seavers and their wives. Through the roofs and gables, I can see them. Every day, they shout and scold and go about their lives. Heedless of the gift, it is to be them. If I was in their skin, I'd treasure every instant. Out there, strolling by the Seine. Taste a morning out there. Like ordinary men, who freely walk about there. Just one day and then I swear I'll be content, with my share. Won't resent, won't despair, old and bent, I won't care. I'll have spent one day out theeeeeeerrre!!! Quote 5 (English version) * (On the other side of the street in the midst of all the activity, walks Phoebus, and his horse, Achilles. Phoebus is consulting a map) * Phoebus: Huh, ya leave town for a couple of decades and they change everything. * (He looks and sees a pair of guards walking by) * Phoebus: Excuse me, gentlemen, I'm looking for the Palace of Justice. Would you-- (they completely ignore him) Huh, I guess not. * (Meanwhile, in a corner, Esmeralda and Djali are dancing for change. A woman and her child walk by, but the woman steers her child away) * Woman: Stay away, child--they're gypsies. They'll steal us blind. * (Phoebus, entranced by Esmeralda's dancing, drops a few coins into the hat on the ground. Soon, a boy on top of the wall whistles. Everything comes to a halt, and all scramble for cover. As Djali grabs the hat, coins fly everywhere. He runs, and Esmeralda runs out to grab the money. As she's gathering the change, the guards arrive) * Guard #1: Alright, gypsy, where'd ya get the money? * Esmeralda: For your information, I earned it. * Guard #1: Gypsies don't earn money. * Guard #2: You steal it? * Guard #1: How do you know? * Guard #2: In fact, you're not from around here, are you? * Esmeralda: Hey, they know what they're saying, just let them go. * Guard #1: Not a chance. * Guard #2: Maybe a day in the stocks will cool you down. * (They fight them, and eventually escape. As the guards begin to chase, Phoebus blocks them with Achilles, and they fall to the ground. Guard #1 is in the right spot, and...) * Phoebus: Achilles! Sit! * (Achilles does so as he is warned, and sits on top of Guard #1) * Phoebus: Oh, dear, I'm sorry. Naughty horse, naughty! He's just impossible! Really, I can't take him anywhere. * Guard #1: Get this fact off me! * Guard #2: (Approaching Phoebus) I'll teach you a lesson, peasant! * (He whips out a small dagger, to which Phoebus pulls out his shining sword) * Phoebus: You were saying....Lieutenant? * (Guard #2 realizes who it is) * Guard #2: Oh, captain! (hits himself on the helmet) At your service, sir! * (Phoebus sheathes his sword, then bends down to Guard #1) * Phoebus: I know you have a lot on your mind right now, but...the Palace of Justice? * (Cut to the guards making a path for Captain Phoebus. As he walks, he sees some coins on the ground. He picks them up and drops them in the hat of an old man sitting on the street. After he passes, the "old man" pulls his hood down to reveal Djali sitting on Esmeralda's head. She looks at him curiously. Phoebus is trying to move through the crowd, but Achilles is refusing to go hunting) * Phoebus: C'mon, boy. Achilles! Heel! * (We zoom into the Palace of Justice, and end up in the dungeon, where a guard in the next room is whipping a prisoner, as Frollo listens. Phoebus enters) * Frollo: Guard! * Guard: Sir? * Frollo: Easy now. Wait between lashes. Otherwise the older sting will dull him to the new. * Guard: Yes, sir. * (Frollo turns to Phoebus) * Frollo: Ah, well, this is the gallant Captain Phoebus, home from the wars. * Phoebus: Reporting for duty, as ordered, sir. * Frollo: Your service record precedes you, Phoebus. I expect nothing but the best from a war hero of your calibre. * Phoebus: And you shall have it, sir. I guarantee it. * Frollo: Yes. You know, my last captain of the guard was, um, a bit of disappointment to me. * (A whip crack and a shriek interrupts Frollo. Phoebus appears alarmed at the crack) * Frollo: Well, no matter. I'm sure you'll whip my men into shape. * Phoebus: Uh, thank you, sir, uh, very well, uh, a tremendous honor, sir. * Frollo: You come to Paris in her darkest hour, Captain. It will take a firm hand to save the weak-minded from being so easily misled. * Phoebus: Misled, sir? * Frollo: Look, Captain--gypsies. The gypsies live outside the normal order. Their heavenly fashions inflame the people's lowest instincts, and they must be stopped. * Phoebus: (A bit surprised) I was summoned from the wars to capture fortune tellers and palm readers? * Frollo: Oh, the real war, Captain, is what you see before you. For twenty years, I have been taking care of the gypsies, one...by...one. * (On each of the last three words, Frollo crushes one of three ants on a tile. He flips the tile over, revealing scores of ants scurrying around underneath) * Frollo: And yet, for all of my success, they have thrived. i believe they have a safe haven, within the walls of this very city. A nest, if you will. They call it the Court of Miracles. * Phoebus: What are we going to do about it, sir? * (Frollo hits the tile back down upside down and turns it, crushing the remainder of the ants) * Phoebus: You make your point quite vividly, sir. * Frollo: You know, I like your captain. Shall we? * (He begins to leave, as the crowd below begins to cheer jubilantly) * Frollo: Oh, duty calls. Have you ever attended a peasant festival, Captain? * Phoebus: Not recently, sir. * Frollo: Then this should be an education for you. Come along. Quote 6 (English version) * (We descend to ground level, and see Quasimodo climbing down the side of the cathedral. He wanders into the crowd, as an oncoming group of people begin to sing) * People: Come one! Come all! Leave your looms and milking stools, coop the hens and pen the mules! Come one! Come all! Close the churches and the schools! It's the day for breaking rules! Come and join the Feast.....of... * Clopin: Fools! Once a year, we throw a party here in town. Once a year, we turn all Paris upside down. Every man's a king and every king's a clown. Once again, it's Topsy-Turvy day! It's the day the devil in us gets released, it's the day we mock the prig and shock the priest. Once again, it's Topsy-Turvy at the Feast of Fools! * (Quasimodo is working his road through the crowd, but he can't escape Clopin, who seems to be singing to Quasimodo) * Crowd: Topsy-Turvy! * Clopin: Everything is upsy-daisy! * Crowd: Topsy-Turvy! * Clopin: Everyone is acting crazy, dross is gold and weeds are a bouquet. That's the road on Topsy-Turvy day! * (Quasimodo, having joined a chorus line of dancers, is shoved away through a curtain and comes smashing into Esmeralda's dressing tent) * Esmeralda: Hey! Are you alright? * Quasimodo: I didn't mean to.....I'm sorry. * Esmeralda: You're not hurt, are you? Here, here, let's see. * Quasimodo: No, no, no! * (Esmeralda tries to pull the hood away from Quasi's face, and he is unsuccessful at stopping her. Djali, upon seeing Quasi's face, sneers. Esmeralda, however, doesn't flinch) * Esmeralda: There. See, no harm done. Just try to be a little more careful. * Quasimodo: I-I-I will. * (He starts to leave) * Esmeralda: By the way, great mask! * (As Quasi exits, we return to the celebration outside) * Crowd: Topsy-Turvy! * Clopin and Crowd: Beat the drums and blow the trumpets! * Crowd: Topsy-Turvy! * Clopin and Crowd: Join the bums and thieves and strumpets, streaming in from Chartres to Calais. * Clopin: Scurvy knaves are extra scurvy, on the sixth of "January". * Clopin and Crowd: All because it's Topsy-Turvy day! * (As Judge Claude Frollo, Phoebus and the guards enter the scene, Clopin jumps onstage to present Esmeralda) * Clopin: Come one! Come all! Hurry, split up, here's your chance, see the mystery and romance. Come one! Come all! See the finest girl in France, make an entrance to entrance. Dance la Esmeralda......dance! * (On the last word, Clopin disappears in a puff of smoke and Esmeralda appears in his place. She proceeds to perform a sultry dance) * Frollo: (To Phoebus) Look at that disgusting display. * Phoebus: (Enthusiastically) Yes, sir! * (She continues to dance. She pulls out a handkerchief and wraps it around Frollo's head playfully, using it to pull him closer. She moves in to kiss him, but jumps away at the last moment. Frollo yanks the handkerchief off his head) * Clopin: And now, ladies and gentlemen, the piece de resistance! Here it is, the moment you've been waiting for! Here it is, you know exactly what's in store! Now's the time we laugh until our sides get sore! Now's the time we crown the King of Fools! You all remember last year's king?! * (Last year's king, carried on the crowd's shoulders, belches frighteningly) * Clopin: So make a face that's horrible and frightening, make a face that's gruesome as a gargoyle's wing. * (Hugo is watching from far above) * Hugo: Hey! * Clopin: For the face that's ugliest will be the King of Fools! Why? * Crowd: Topsy-Turvy! * Clopin: Ugly folks, forget your shyness! * Crowd: Topsy-Turvy! * Clopin: Soon you could be called your highness! * Crowd: Put your foulest features on display, be the king of Topsy-Turvy day! * (Clopin has been pulling contestants onto the stage. Esmeralda pulls Quasimodo to the stage. Esmeralda works her road down the line, tearing off masks and revealing the ugly faces underneath. The festivities continue until Esmeralda reaches Quasi. She tries to pull Quasi's mask off, but soon realizes that it's not a mask) * Man #1: That's no mask! * Woman #1: It's his face! * Woman #2: He's hideous! * Man #2: It's the bell ringer from Notre Dame! * (Quasi, realizing that people are disgusted by him, is devastated. Frollo realizes that the only man left standing on stage is Quasimodo. Clopin, trying to keep facts festive, jumps in) * Clopin: Ladies and gentlemen, don't panic. We asked for the ugliest face in Paris, and here he is! Quasimodo, the hunchback of Notre Dame! * (Upon hearing Clopin, the crowd grows festive once again, and Clopin crowns Quasimodo the King of Fools) * Clopin: Eve-ry-bo-dy! * Crowd: Once a year, we throw a party here in town. * Clopin: Hail to the king! * Crowd: Once a year, we turn all Paris upside down. * Clopin: Oh, what a king! * Crowd: Once a year, the ugliest will wear a crown. * Clopin: Girls, give a kiss. * Crowd: Once a year on Topsy-Turvy day. * Clopin: We've never had a king like this * Crowd: And it's the day, we do the facts that we deplore on the other three-hundred-and-sixty-four. Once a year we love to drop in, where the beer is never stopping. For the chance to burst some popinjay, and pick a king who'll put the top in Topsy...Turvy...day! (Topsy-turvy!) (Mad and crazy, upsy-daisy Topsy-Turvy day!) * (From above, the gargoyles whoop and cheer, while down on the ground, the crowd chants Quasimodo's name. To the side, Guards 1 and 2 are watching) * Guard #2: Now you think he's ugly? Watch this! * (He throws a tomato at Quasi, hitting him square in the face. The crowd swiftly goes silent) * Guard #2: Now that's ugly! * Guard #3: (Mockingly) Hail to the king! * (He throws another tomato. Soon, Quasi is being pelted with produce of all kinds. Shouts come from all directions. Soon Quasi is lassoed and tied down on a rotating platform. He is spun around, as onlookers continue their torment. He sees Frollo watching and shouts for help) * Quasimodo: Master! Master, please! Help me! * (Phoebus has seen enough) * Phoebus: Sir, request permission to stop this cruelty. * Frollo: In a moment, Captain. A lesson needs to be learned here. * (As soon as she's said this, the crowd gasps and goes silent) Quote 7 (English version) * (Phoebus and Frollo look up to the stage to see this and see Esmeralda ascending the steps. She kneels next to Quasimodo) * Esmeralda: Don't be afraid. I'm sorry. This wasn't supposed to happen. * Frollo: You! Gypsy girl! Get down at once! * Esmeralda: Yes, your honor. Just as I soon as I free this poor creature. * Frollo: I forbid it! * (Esmeralda whips out a knife and cuts the ropes, holding Quasi) * Frollo: How dare you defy me! * Esmeralda: You mistreat this poor boy the same fashion you mistreat my people. You speak of justice, yet you are cruel to these most in need of your help! * Frollo: ''SILENCE!!!!!'' * Esmeralda: Justice! * Frollo: Mark my words, gypsy. You will pay for this insolence. * Esmeralda: Then it appears we've crowned the wrong fool. The only fool I see is you! * Frollo: Captain Phoebus! Arrest her. * (Phoebus motions for his guards to move in and arrest her. They surround the stage) * Esmeralda: Now, let's see. (Counting the guards) One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten of you and one of me. What's a poor girl to do? * (She begins to weep, but disappears in an explosion of smoke) * Frollo: Witchcraft! * (From another location) * Esmeralda: Oh, boys! Over here! * Guard: There she is! * Another Guard: ''GET HER!!' * (She leads the guards on a wild goose chase. At one point, she knocks a large cage containing an old prisoner to the ground. It goes rolling away, until it comes to a stop and the lock breaks open. He steps out) * Old Prisoner: I'm free, I'm free! * (He trips and falls into the stockade, which closes and locks) * Old Prisoner: Dang it. * (Meanwhile, Esmeralda continues to evade the guards. At one point, she and Djali jump on top of the crowd, which carries them away to safety. Two guards attempt the same move, and the crowd swiftly moves away. She grabs a helmet from one of the guards and throws it like a frisbee. It hits three guards and knocks them out, before almost chopping Phoebus' head off) * Phoebus: What a woman! * (Two guards on horseback are chasing Esmeralda. As she jumps over Frollo's stand, someone throws the guards a staff. Each holding onto an end, the horizontal staff slices through Frollo's stand, sending him diving for shelter. Esmeralda ascends the top of a stand, but promptly disappears) * Frollo: (To Phoebus) Find her, Captain! I want her alive! * Phoebus: Yes, sir. Seal off the area, men. Find the gypsy girl, and do not harm her! * (Frollo has ridden over to Quasimodo. He hangs his head low) * Quasimodo: (Whispering) I'm sorry, master. I will never disobey you again. * (He moves to the entrance to the cathedral as the rain begins to fall. He goes in, but slowly closes the door to his freedom) Quote 8 (English version) * (Dissolve forward in time to Phoebus and the guards searching for Esmeralda. She is disguised, again with Djali as the old man. She sneaks into the church. Phoebus sees her and recognizes who this is. He follows her alone. As he comes up behind her, she turns and grabs his sword) * Esmeralda: You! * (She forces him to the floor, holding him there with the tip of his sword at his chin) * Phoebus: Easy, easy--I just shaved this morning. * Esmeralda: Oh, really? You missed a spot. * Phoebus: Alright, alright. Just calm down. Just give me a chance to recognize. * Esmeralda: For what? * (As she lets down her guard for a split second, Phoebus grabs the sword from her hands and turns it on her) * Phoebus: That, for example. * Esmeralda: You sneaky son of a-- * Phoebus: Ah-ah-ah! Watch it--you're in a church. * (She has picked up a staff with candle on top) * Esmeralda: Are you always this charming, or am I just lucky? * (She swings the staff at Phoebus, who blocks it with his sword. They fight) * Phoebus: (Between Esmeralda's swings) Candlelight...privacy...music. Can't think of a better place for hand-to-hand combat! You fight almost as well as a man! * Esmeralda: Funny. I was going to say the same fact about you. * Phoebus: That's hitting a little below the belt, don't you think? * Esmeralda: No. This is. * (She swings one end of the staff at Phoebus' crotch. He blocks it with his sword. She swiftly hits him in the face with the other end of the staff. She shakes it off) * Phoebus: Touchy! * (Djali butts him in the chest) * Phoebus: I didn't know you had a child. * Esmeralda: Well, he doesn't take kindly to soldiers. * (The fighting has subsided) * Phoebus: Eh, I noticed. Permit me. I'm Phoebus. It means "sun god". And you are? * Esmeralda: Is this an interrogation? * Phoebus: It's called an introduction. * Esmeralda: You're not arresting me? * Phoebus: Not as long as you're in here. I can't. * Esmeralda: You're not at all like the other soldiers. * Phoebus: Thank you. * Esmeralda: Well, if you're not going to arrest me, what do you want? * Phoebus: I'd settle for your name. * Esmeralda: Esmeralda. * Phoebus: It's beautiful. Much better than Phoebus, anyway. * (As they gaze into each other's eyes, neither notices Frollo and the guards approaching) * Frollo: Good work, Captain! Now arrest her. * (Phoebus yet has his back to Frollo) * Phoebus: (Whispering to Esmeralda) Claim sanctuary. * (She looks at him oddly) * Phoebus: Say this! * Esmeralda: You tricked me! * Frollo: I'm waiting, Captain. * Phoebus: I'm sorry, sir. She claims sanctuary. There's nothing I can do. * Frollo: Then drag her outside at-- * (The archdeacon has entered) * Archdeacon: Frollo! You will not hurt her! (To Esmeralda, whom he has approached) Don't worry. Minister Frollo learned years ago to respect the sanctity of the church. * (Frollo and the guards turn to leave. Frollo ducks around a pillar and doubles back. As the remainder of the people have passed, Frollo jumps out, grabs Esmeralda's arm and twists it behind her. He whispers into her ear) * Frollo: You think you've outwitted me, but I am a patient man, and gypsies don't do well inside stone walls. * (He pauses, then breathes deeply, smelling Esmeralda's hair) * Esmeralda: Whatcha doing here? * Frollo: I was just imagining a rope around that beautiful neck. * (Frollo caresses her neck, but she pulls away) * Esmeralda: I know what you were imagining. * Frollo: Such a clever witch. Very typical of your kind, to twist the truth to cloud the mind with unholy thoughts. Well, no matter. (He begins to leave) You've chosen a magnificent prison, but it is a prison nonetheless. Set one foot outside, and you're mine! * (He exits, pulling the door shut behind him. She rushes over to another door, only to find guards outside) * Guard: Frollo's orders! Post a guard at every door. * (She locks it shut. Djali comes back to her) * Esmeralda: One fact, Djali--if Frollo thinks that he can keep us here, he's wrong. * Archdeacon: Don't act rashly, child. You created quite a stir at the festival. It would be unwise to arouse Frollo's frustration further. * Esmeralda: You saw what he did out there, letting the crowd torture that poor boy. I thought if just one person could stand up to him, then... (She sighs) What do they have against people who are different, anyway? * Archdeacon: You can't right all the wrongs in this world by yourself. * Esmeralda: No one out there's going to help, that's for sure. * Archdeacon: Perhaps there's someone in here who can. * (He gracefully motions towards the inside of the church, then exits. Esmeralda moves into the church) Quote 9 (English version) Quote 10 (English version) Quote 11 (English version) Quote 12 (English version) Quote 13 (English version) * (Dissolve to morning. Frollo is exiting his carriage. Waiting for him is Phoebus) * Phoebus: (To Guards) Attention! (To Frollo) Morning, sir. * (Frollo moans) * Phoebus: Are you feeling alright? * Frollo: I had a little damage with the fireplace. * Phoebus: I see. Your orders, sir? * Frollo: Find the gypsy girl. * (Fast music, cut to troops ransacking a home, eventually finding a group of gypsies hidden in a trapdoor. The gypsies are lined up outside, with Frollo looking down at them) * Frollo: Ten pieces of silver for the gypsy Esmeralda. * (He shoves a handful of coins out, but there are no takers) * Frollo: (To Guards) Lock them up! * (Now we watch Frollo's men push past a carriage into the Seine. As it begins to sink, gypsies come floating to the surface. Once again, they're lined up, with Frollo surveying them) * Frollo: Twenty pieces of silver for the gypsy Esmeralda! * (Again, no takers) * Frollo: (To Guards) Take them away! Quote 14 (English version) Quote 15 (English version) Quote 16 (English version) Quote 17 (English version) Quote 18 (English version) Quote 19 (English version) *(Upstairs, Quasimodo bursts into the bedroom jubilantly) *Quasimodo: We've done it, Esmeralda! We've beaten them back! Come and see! *(She doesn't move) *Quasimodo: Esmeralda? Wake up! You're safe now. *(He pauses, but yet nothing) *Quasimodo: Esmeralda? Oh, dear! *(He gets a spoonful of water, and tries to make her drink it. She doesn't) *Quasimodo: Oh, dear. *(He begins to weep. The gargoyles felt fearless and awful for Quasi. Laverne silently closes the door. Frollo enters and touches Quasi on his hump) *Quasimodo: You murdered her. *Frollo: It was my duty, horrible as it was. I hope you can forgive me. There, there, Quasimodo, I know it hurts. But now, the time has come to end your suffering. Forever. *(We see that Frollo has a dagger. As Frollo raises it to stab him, Quasi sees the shadow of the dagger. He turns and fights with Frollo only briefly, before wresting the dagger from Frollo's hands and backing him into a corner) *Frollo: Now, now, listen to me, Quasimodo. *Quasimodo: No, you listen! All my life you have warned me that the world is a dark, cruel place. But now, I see that the only fact dark and cruel about it is people like you! *(He throws away the dagger) *Esmeralda: Quasimodo? *(He turns and sees Esmeralda sitting on the bed) *Quasimodo: Esmeralda! *Frollo: She lives! *(Frollo grabs a sword) *Quasimodo: No! *(He grabs Esmeralda and runs out onto the balcony. Frollo follows, but as he gets outside, he sees nothing but gargoyles. After looking left and right, he looks out over the edge and finds Quasi hanging there with Esmeralda) *Frollo: Leaving so soon? *(He swings his sword, but Quasi dodges the blow by swinging to another spot. Down on the ground, the guards stop to watch this in shock) *Guard: Up there! *(Frollo goes to swing again) *Quasimodo: Hang on! *(Quasi swings off again, just narrowly missing Frollo's sword. Eventually, Frollo gets Quasimodo cornered) *Frollo: I should have known you'd risk your life to save that gypsy witch. Just as your own mother died trying to save you. *Quasimodo: What?! *Frollo: Now I'm going to do what I should have done twenty years ago! *(He swings his cape, covering Quasi's head. But as he tries to throw Quasi off the balcony, the panicking Quasi pulls Frollo off as well. Now Frollo is hanging onto Quasi, who is hanging onto Esmeralda) *Esmeralda: Hold on. Hold on. *(Frollo throws his cape around another gargoyle, laughing wickedly. He stands up and is about to swing at Esmeralda) *Frollo: And he shall smite the wicked and plunge them into the fiery pit! *(The gargoyle, however, begins to crack. Frollo is thrown off-guard, and hangs onto the gargoyle's head. Suddenly, the gargoyle comes to life and roars. Frollo shrieks, and now the gargoyle breaks off, sending Frollo falling to his death. Meanwhile, Esmeralda is losing her grip on Quasimodo) *Esmeralda: Quasimodo! Quasi! *(He slips loose and begins to fall) *Esmeralda: No!!! *(He falls right along the building, close enough for Phoebus to catch him several floors below and pull him back into the building. As Quasi sees who has caught him, he and Phoebus hug. Esmeralda comes running in. After Esmeralda hugs him, he takes Esmeralda's hand and Phoebus' hand, who puts them together. They kiss, and Quasi grins broadly) Quote 20 (English version) * (Cut to ground level, where Phoebus and Esmeralda emerge into the light. As the crowd cheers, Esmeralda turns back to the open doorway. She comes back and leads out Quasimodo. The crowd goes silent. Soon, a little girl cautiously comes forward from the crowd. She looks at him, then pets his face. Then they hug, and Quasi picks her up and puts her up on his shoulder. The crowd begins to cheer. As he moves into the crowd, they do not move away as before. The gargoyles are above, breaking out the champagne) * Clopin: Three cheers for Quasimodo!! * (The crowd breaks into loud cheering) * Clopin: Well...here is a riddle you never can guess. Sing the bells of Notre Dame! What makes a monster, and what makes a man? Whatever their pitch, you can hear them bewitch you, the rich and the ritual knells, of the bells of Notre Dame! * (A long pullout, as we see the crowd following Quasi, then the gargoyles looking over them. Birds have once again covered Laverne) * Laverne: Don't you ever migrate? * (We continue to pull out, until the entire city is in view. Fade to black. The end) Quote 21 (English version) Quote 22 (English version) Quote 23 (English version) Quote 24 (English version) Quote 25 (English version) Quote 26 (English Version) Quote 27 (English version) Category:Fake Barney in Other Media Category:Fake Barney Movie Category:2004 Category:2005 Category:2006